Love yourself (become selfish)

Commit to nofap

Work out at least 3 times a week

Invest your money (crypto, stocks, real estate, etfs, funds)

Stop bad habits (snoozing, gossiping, procrastinating)

Plan your days

Learn how to cook and eat healthier meals

Weekly walks (in nature, no headphones/airpods/music/distractions)

Drink water daily (1-2 liters)

Read at least 5-10 pages of an (e)book

Quit drugs/alcohol (you don’t need that bs)

Meditate or practice the wim hof method

Give to the less fortunate

Cut out bad friends & family

Practice minimalism

Learning a skill (coding, music, designing, marketing, storytelling)

Build something valuable (a business, podcast, blog, vlog, brand, product)

Protect your family

Embrace traditional gender roles

Talk to your Creator

Take cold showers

Drink something bitter once in a while

Take risks and be adventurous

Conquer a fear

Photo by Mohamed Nohassi on Unsplash

NB: This article will trigger a lot of people. Continue reading if you would like to learn why and create your masculine character.

I’d like to begin by first defining masculinity. What it is and what it’s not according to me. Then I’ll cover the traits and characteristics you need to integrate and work on.

I believe greatness is coming to all the people who read this and understand it. Feel free to share your thoughts down below in the comments.

Masculinity

Masculinity is the lost art of being a strong, confident, intelligent, skillful, and manly character that is focused on the pursuit of an ultimate goal bigger than himself, women, and those around him.

Masculinity is not toxic, aggressive, and overly sexual. On the contrary, it’s a man who is in constant pursuit of things far greater than himself. Constantly improving himself and those around him. A true high-value man who is solving problems and creating things for the benefit of himself and others.

A man is destined to be a protector and provider. He understands his roles and follows the ways of his ancestors.

In this age of betas, white knights, simps, and soy boys, a masculine man sets himself apart by being a strong, charismatic, and useful member of society.

Tell me who are the first people to respond and react in times of danger? Who makes up the large percentage of protectors? Who provides the most? Who are the most willing to lay down their lives for others?

Never before has masculinity been this demonized. By no means am I saying that Toxic Masculinity doesn’t exist, what I am saying is that a large percentage of so-called feminists have bundled up good/necessary masculinity and toxic masculinity into one thing. Toxic Feminism has made attacking men/masculinity its sole purpose and they are winning! How do I know this? Look at the crime rates. Look at the no of fatherless children. These are the consequences of the erosion of masculinity.

But I like a quote by The Path To Manliness.

“When the barbarians are at the gates, suddenly masculinity is no longer toxic.”

How to create your own masculine character and live up to it

To create one, we first must know the characteristics of one. Here are a few examples. Remember we are working towards becoming a truly high-value man, not faking it. Go against the grain. Pick some characteristics, give yourself a time frame or a deadline then put in the work.

• Physically, Emotionally and Mentally Strong
• Intelligent and Highly Skilled
• Calm, Collected, and Stoic
• Having the ability to exercise extreme violence but remaining virtuous - A controlled monster. The true meaning of morality, virtue, and humility. Definition first coined by Jordan Peterson. A harmless person is not a virtuous person. When a harmless person tastes power, they cease to be virtuous as they become drunk with it and begin showing their true colors.
• Self Control
• A Risk Taker
• Kind and Generous
• Playful and Charismatic
• Assertive and Dominant but not arrogant
• Independence
• Leadership
• Ambition
• Integrity
• Socialized
• Well Dressed and Groomed
• Respectful
• Dangerous
• Focused
• Sexual - At the appropriate time
• Mysterious
• Capable of transmuting sexual energy instead of spilling it carelessly

These are but a few examples. To create your own hyper-masculine character, I’d suggest you pick 5 then work on them.

Physical Strength and Virtue are a must. They ensure you are capable of protecting the things that are important to you without being a bully/brute. You don’t want to be a brute who bullies people in an attempt to garner respect. You want to be a protector. One who is naturally respected.

Skillfulness ensures you are capable of providing for your family.

Make sure that whatever you pick leads you down a path that will guarantee you can provide and protect. As these 2 things are key.

I am no different from beta males. Growing up mostly fatherless is hurting society.

But I am changing things, I am on the journey of becoming a masculine and high-value man. You have to remember it starts with you. Be the change you want to see in society. Don’t just spill your seed carelessly. The world doesn’t need more fatherless children, soy boys, betas, simps, and white knights.

It needs masculine role models willing to take the lead.

I am working on myself, constantly trying to put to death the less desirable traits within me. It’s a battle. But it’s one that I know I can win.

What about you?

I’d like to end with a quote: “Strong Men and Feminine Women Create Good Times, Good Times Create Soft Men and Masculine Women, Soft Men and Masculine Women Create Hard Times, and Repeat” It’s a modification of the original quote. Gender roles were created for a purpose. Find out what that purpose is and integrate. We are experiencing gender role reversal and it’s causing damage.

Share your thoughts in the comments and if this triggered you, I’d like to know why, so do due diligence.

And of course. Do due diligence, raise your testosterone, and research. I’ve written a plethora of articles that can help you in your journey. Go read them.

Have a great day!

“The most important investment you can make is in yourself. Very few people get anything like their potential horsepower translated into the actual horsepower of their output in life. Potential exceeds realization for many people…The best asset is your own self. You can become to an enormous degree the person you want to be. “

Warren Buffett

The very best investment you can make is one that “you can’t beat,” can’t be taxed and not even inflation can take away from you. And that is you!

Without working on ourselves and improving ourselves every day, it would be unrealistic for us to expect a much different future from the one we have right now, it would also be unrealistic for us to perform better in the future because we will be no different tomorrow from the person we are today.

That is why YOU and GOD are the most important people you can place your time and money on.

An investment in yourself is a great example of self-love, and may very well be the most profitable investment you will ever make.

The worst thing you can do that will self-sabotage the ‘future” you is continuing to do the same thing and assuming that you will automatically improve and advance to where you wish to be. That is definitely wishful thinking. Let’s not forget that madness is doing something over and over expecting the same good results.

No improvement in our lives will happen automatically without us working on them. If we want to get better then we have to work on it.

And no one is exempt from this fact.

Whether you are a powerful CEO wanting to expand his company and build his legacy or an employee at the lowest point in the corporate ladder wishing to climb it faster, self-investment, therefore making yourself become more valuable to others around you is what will make you achieve those objectives.

When you are bold enough to take steps that will improve your performance and overall well-being, the universe will respond by granting you amazing results.

The effort you put into consistently investing in yourself will also play a large role in determining the quality of your life now and in the future.

The surest way to achieve a better quality life, to be successful, productive, and satisfied is to place a priority on investing in both personal and professional growth. The effort you put into consistently investing in yourself plays a large role in determining the quality of your life now and in the future.

Consider these:-

1. Develop Your Skills

Improving your skills doesn’t always mean investing in higher education, though that’s surely an option, and perhaps a necessary one depending upon your career field. Investing in your knowledge and skills can take many forms. We live in the information age, you can literary learn and grow your career for free. Think YouTube, Curiosity(The App), Lifehack, etc

In addition, expanding your level of knowledge and skill isn’t limited to the business arena and doesn’t necessarily need to be formal. There are many “skill investment” avenues.

• Advance your education – extra classes, advanced degrees, relevant certifications, are all valuable investments. Take classes, either in person or online. (Lifehack also offers this Masterclass that helps you to break free from limitations.)
• Utilize available training – enroll in workshops, attend conferences or participate in webinars.
• Expand your knowledge – there’s a lot of information available on nearly any subject imaginable. Read books, articles, white papers, anything related to the talent or skill you want to work on.
• Keep current – stay abreast of the latest trends or advancements. Subscribe to publications, read blogs of experts, and follow the latest news.
• Stay tuned to my blog – I post on topics touching Technology, Cybersecurity, Self Improvement, Fitness, Fashion, and Lifestyle. Subscribe!

2. Explore Your Creative Side

There is a fountain of creativity within most of us that has never been tapped or certainly hasn’t been used to its highest potential. We may need to unearth and hone our individual creativity.

Creativity, in any form, helps us to grow personally and professionally, to view problems and solutions in different ways, and to utilize other parts of our mind that may have been previously untapped. It’s important to keep in mind that creativity has many faces. It’s far broader than being a painter or sculptor; it’s also about trying new things.

• Learn a new language – take a class or use language training software.
• Try gourmet cooking – enroll in a formal class, buy a new cookbook, or ask someone you know who enjoys cooking in a different way.
• Write something – a book, short stories, poetry, anything.
• Explore the outside world – try gardening, bird watching, or landscape photography.
• Enjoy music – play an instrument, learn a new one or join a music group of some kind.
• Create something tangible – paint, sculpt, make pottery, make jewelry or design your own clothes.

Choose some form of activity that you have never tried, haven’t practiced in years, or have never explored fully.

3. Nurture Your Mind and Body

Nurturing both your mind and body allows you to have more to give now and in the future — more energy, more knowledge, more compassion, more ideas, greater strength, physical and mental endurance.

Expand your mind. Learning new things and keeping your mind active even in simple ways helps to grow and maintain your mental ability.

• Read – anything and everything.
• Explore culture – attend performances, listen to different music, travel, or join an organization or group comprised of people from different backgrounds.
• Open your mind – engage in conversations with those who disagree with you. Look at an argument and try to make a case for the opposing point of view.
• Keep your mind active – play word games, (yes, even Words with Friends counts,) board games that include strategy, or try using your brain to perform simple calculations rather than relying on a calculator.
• SLEEP – Yes sleep is important. It helps consolidate memories. Helps heal the brain. Helps the brain eliminate toxins. Improves focus, attention, retention, and clarity. Skipping even an hour is detrimental to your overall health. 8 hours is recommended. If you can 10 hours. And just like junk food, its effects seem nonexistent, at first but as the days and years go by things start becoming worse. Just adding 1 hour of sleep to your 8-hour schedule increases your lifespan. So stop listening to your parents. Use your “software”. Keep it up to date and “patched” otherwise you’ll end up using your “hardware”.
• Meditation – Try it, am sure you are already well acquainted with the word.
• Drink water, take a little more sodium(salt), and if possible add some Omega 3s.

Care for your body. Your body is like a well-oiled machine. If you care for it in the way that you might maintain an expensive car, it will perform marvelously and last for a very long time. Remember the basics:

• Give it high-quality fuel – meaning to make healthy food choices as often as possible. What you eat does play a large role in your energy and ability to perform. You truly are what you eat.
• Don’t push it too hard – meaning to rest and relax often, slow down, and don’t overload your system. Also, don’t shift gears too quickly; it causes stress and damage to “your machine,” A.K.A. your body.
• Get regular and necessary maintenance – meaning to go to the doctor when you’re sick – don’t put it off until you totally break down. Better yet, use preventative maintenance; get check-ups, take appropriate vitamins and pay attention to irregular or erratic behavior.
• Polish the exterior – meaning to take care of the outside too. Many people dismiss this as frivolous and self-indulgent, but it’s not as long as you don’t go overboard. We’re not talking about facelifts and Botox, we’re talking about getting a fabulous haircut, and wearing clothes that make you feel confident and attractive.

4. Invest in your finances

A lot of people say that money won’t bring you any happiness, and that may very well be true, but you can’t ignore the fact that being financially independent will give you the freedom to do the things you love a lot more.

And that definitely does bring a measure of fulfillment and happiness.

It does pay to be financially independent, that is why you must invest time in maintaining and managing your finances wisely.

As many financial planners will tell you, building wealth is a process made of many small actions that add up over time. So if you want to see your bank account grow over the next year, adopting new money and lifestyle habits now is a smart way to start.

So learn how to save more, read on and talk to the people who are successful financially, and devote 10 minutes a day to building a new financial skill. This will be of great value to you throughout your entire lifetime.

5. Invest in your self-confidence

Confidence in yourself will take you places.

Self-confidence will determine whether you stand up for yourself or not. It will determine whether you find the courage to leave a dysfunctional relationship or continue staying in one. It will make you act on your business plan or not. And it will mostly be the determining factor in whether you succeed or not.

So find the time to invest in building your self-confidence. Learn to have the courage to speak your truth. The more you love yourself and own the value that you offer, the more confident you will become in sharing it with others.

Investing in your personal confidence is a great investment that will even inspire others to do the same.

6. Invest in your relationships

One thing we can’t use an ‘instant results’ business model on and expect it to flourish is ‘our personal relationships’.

Relationships add more value to who we are and they take time to build. Your priceless most valuable relationships won’t take one day to build; they will take years and years. But they are also not built automatically without us putting in any effort. Go out there build your communication skills. Keep in touch with friends, family, and acquaintances. Unfortunately for me, I sweat and get anxious at the thought of starting conversations especially with people i don’t know so well. I am an Introvert and an INFJ to be more specific. Still, I can be quite the blabbermouth when I genuinely and truly know someone and they do me.

We need to work on building them all the time otherwise they will slowly fade and die off.

This applies to business relationships as well.

The benefits reaped from building our relationships can be measured and seen over their lifetime value. The more they grow, the more value they will have and the more valuable benefits you will see.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Investing in yourself emotionally, physically, spiritually, and financially truly makes a difference in your life, your well-being, and your ability to thrive and perform to the best of your ability. The extent to which you invest in yourself, mind and body, not only shapes the way you interact with the outside world, it often reflects the opinion you have of yourself and this will affect your chances of success in the future.

Your future is in large part determined by your willingness and ability to invest in yourself now.

One of the most important rules in life is for you to “Invest in yourself”. If you don’t, who else will? You and only you have to be proactive enough to take that responsibility.

Be yourself, and do what you can to make yourself the best you can be.

If you are a man then you must absolutely do this as the world demands it. We are called to be builders and providers.

So invest in yourself, because your future depends on it. R

That’s it for today, have a wonderful day.

First of all

What is Flow State?

Flow is a state of mind in which a person becomes fully immersed in an activity. Positive psychologist Mihály Csíkszentmihályi describes flow as a state of complete immersion in an activity.

While in this mental state, people are completely involved and focused on what they are doing.

The ego falls away. Time flies. Every action, movement, and thought follows inevitably from the previous one, like playing jazz. Your whole being is involved, and you’re using your skills to the utmost," Csíkszentmihályi said in an interview with Wired magazine.

Benefits/Characteristics of Flow State

1. A heavy sense of concentration
2. Sense of clarity
3. Greater happiness
4. Increased engagement
5. Improved performance
6. More creativity
7. Greater enjoyment and fulfillment

Here are the steps of achieving flow state or deep work as others like to call it:

1. Remove Distractions

Eliminate all distractions:

1. Switch off your phone or put it in airplane mode
2. Close your room door
3. Put on some headphones
4. Make sure you are well hydrated and have eating to your fill
5. Journal to avoid internal distractions

2. Challenge and Skill Balance

Flow state requires a balance between one’s skills and the challenge at hand: if the challenge is too demanding, we become disheartened and can experience negative emotions such as anxiety. Conversely, if a task is too easy, we become disinterested and indifferent – when we experience flow we are actively engaged but not overwhelmed by a challenge.

3. Try Some Music

LoFi, Jazz, Classical Music(Mozart, Beethoven), and White Noise have all been shown(scientifically) to increase mental performance, focus and boost concentration. Try finding something that’s not too complicated or with lyrics.

Here are some examples:

• Inspire Yourself by Neotic
• Monday Jazz by Jazz and Bossa Collection
• LoFi HipHop Radio - Beats to relax/study/work to by Lofi Girl
• Best of Classical Music by Just Instrumental Music
• White Noise by Relaxing White Noise

4. Set Up Your Environment

Make sure:

1. There’s water and quick snacks
2. The time is perfect when you are at your biological peak - Mine’s early in the morning before anyone has woken up or late at night when everyone’s asleep. Notice the trend. People are often sleeping hence conquers rule no 1, no distractions.
3. Light some candles, incense, or some diffuser of sorts - This prepares the mood and sets the stage. Research more about the kind of scents that make your brain more in tune with work. My fragrance/scent of choice is Sandalwood. Got some sandalwood + natural pyrethrum incense sticks. This clears 2 steps 1. eliminating distractions: mosquitos and 2. propping up my environment.
4. Make sure everything you’ll need is at arm’s length
5. Keep a small notebook to jot down things you may encounter as during flow state you may realize a sharp rise in the brain’s ability to find solutions and ideas.

5. Don’t Multitask or Procrastinate

Multitasking and Procrastinating kill flow state.

1. Have a todo list
2. Avoid doing 2 things at a time
3. Start with an easier task then slowly do more challenging tasks(not too challenging read step no 2)
4. Try the Pomodoro technique or the alternative Animedoro technique

Our partner of today: Santa Lucia Fragrance

Santa Lucia Fragrance has an oil diffusing kit that will help you achieve flow state. Especially if you choose their “Work” scent. This goes a long way to helping you achieve flow state and boost your confidence. Aside from their oil diffuser, they also sell 3 unique and different fragrances for Work/Office/To Conquering, Play/Sensual/Come Closer, and Everyday.

And they are giving you 10% off all their products. Better hurry, their products sell out fast. Linked down below are their oil diffuser kit, car diffuser kit, and their 3 fragrances. The coupon code is: STEPHENAJULU

• Santa Lucia Fragrance Oil Diffuser Kit
• Santa Lucia Fragrance Car Diffuser Kit
• Santa Lucia Fragrance 3 Perfume Kit

Check out their other products and learn more about the science that went into the designing of their scent: Santa Lucia Fragrance

Science of Their Scent

Now I’ll show you the paid and slightly more technical ways to build your first blog.

NOTE: Below are ways that require a little technical knowledge, if you don’t have that, kindly go to the first post of the series.

WordPress Org Way

1. Research and find a good hosting platform with a cpanel and wordpress quick install(softaculous or similar).
2. Buy a domain name and hosting.
3. Go to cpanel and click Wordpress or Softaculous then Wordpress. Let it install.
4. Once ready visit your wordpress site’s admin panel and start editing or posting right away. You may be required to add ssl yourself but your host will provide you with details.

This guide isn’t in-depth so visit the official guide.

Ghost Way

Tip: Ghost is an awesome platform for bloggers.

Go to the official installation guide: Ghost Install Guide

The JAMstack Way

This blog was built the JAMstack way, no servers, just built using hugo and rendered as html.

To build such,

1. You must first research your framework of choice, there’s Hugo(the best in my opinion), Gatsby(fast page load), Gridsome(same as gatsby), Hexo, Jekyll(slow build times, excellent theme list) and Eleventy(mainly technical)
2. Once the decision is made, i’ll proceed with hugo but the steps are pretty much the same. Find a theme. For example hugo themes.
3. Fork, clone and start editing(i cut out how to clone because i prefer it being in another article for now do your research, you don’t even need to clone to your machine, just work from the fork.
4. Editing should be simple, eg for Hugo, go into the config.toml or .yaml file and change the variables.
5. You can now go to content then posts, copy the structure of example posts and start writing.
6. Alternatively find a theme with a headless cms and start working from there
7. Alternatively again try StackBit, it’s free and you can build a great blog there.

That’s it for today. To learn more about the JAMstack way, go check out this, this and this where i show you exactly how this blog was built.

1. As usual, you have to get into the right mindset, there is no perfect blog, write about what you want to write about. I like tech, finance, self branding, self improvement and lifestyle, so that’s what i write, you don’t have to be extremely knowledgeable in the topic, everyone knows something you don’t and so do you. So write about what you love and want. Value is provided with your heart not your mind.
2. Choose a platform. Many of you have been with me since my WordPress.com days. Btw Thank you! My blog back then wasn’t appealing(though some of you thought it was) and i couldn’t change the appearance all that much because wordpress.com was restrictive in their free service. So you too can start there, right now open a new tab and type wordpress.com, enter. If you are not comfortable with the free wordpress, try the self hosted version(PAID, I’ll talk about this in another post), or wix or substack or weebly or blogger or ghost(PAID, I’ll talk about this later) or deploy your own(little html knowledge required, like mine, I’ll talk about this in another post)
3. Once you find your platform of choice, register and you can now start writing.

Yes, it’s that simple. Next time(part 2), I’ll tell you how you can use the self hosted paid wordpress, ghost and how you also build your own(little html knowledge required + i can build one for you.)